Painting my Nightmares

I suffer from sleep paralasys from time to time, and the best way to deal with it for me is to get it out into the open. Sometimes the nightmares are so vivid, that they are easily remembered and can be painted to some degree of accuracy.

Some sort of hybrid insect like creature I encounter regularly in my nightmares. Despite their grotesque appearance, they are usually quite harmless and leave me alone.

One of the worst sleep paralysis I have ever had became a painting. It still, to this very day, remains unfinished. I just couldn't. It remains incomplete, gathering dust at my parents house (and facing the wall). It's probably the only painting that my mother refuses to hang, and trust me, she hangs EVERYTHING I do. It freaks her out too much.

The story goes like this, taken from a dream diary just after the experience, however, I made it a little more coherent for the reader.

"Scariest dream of my life: an oldish bearded man arrives outside my house in a big Daimler like car. He gets out, wearing a huge fur-like overcoat and holding an antique cane. looks at me deeply in the eyes and proclaims in a soft and deep voice....

"Aren't you gonna let me IN?" to which I scream "NOOOOOOOO!!!!"

I then suddenly look into the nearby mirror. I am shocked to see my glasses are off and my eyes are fucked up looking in obscure directions. They bright red with heavy black in the middle, somewhat like Sadako from Ringu.

Suddenly I notice the creepy man is standing behind me in the mirror! I turn round to find he is not there....."

Up to this point I am sure I am wide awake.

  
The presence of this entity felt demonic more than anything. I was too scared to go back to sleep.
He was a really evil and sinister looking man, somewhat resembling Derren Brown possessed by Satan or Jahbulon or Baal or something of that nature. It gave a completely haunting and unpleasant vibe, like my life became a Steven King novella, only WORSE!

The fact that I thought I was wide awake increased the fear tremendously... I eventually was able to move (I was frozen throughout the experience) and then I burst into awakened reality.

Awakening into reality felt like breaking through the surface of a dark ocean.

I waited for ages to make sure I was actually awake. I didn't dare to leave my bed for many hours in the dark, I just couldn't be certain if I was awake. You can never tell with paralysis.....NEVER!

Here is the progression of the painting.

"Aren't you gonna let me in?"

My face in the mirror

Please.... Let me IN!

My start to eyes freak me out, and he now stands behind me....

Up until this point I had to put my brush down. I was too scared to continue... I am still too scared to continue one year later.... I think this piece will never be finished. Too much pain. Too much fear.

Tittikaka joins forces with gay.edge.liberation showcasing 'Homo' inspired artwork

HENRY's Gallery Modern & Contemporary Art is dedicated to the theme of homosexuality, with their third exhibition QUEER. It draws a line between aesthetics, irony and social criticism. In this context, the gallery premiers works by a gay street artist from Germany and a London artist. The opening of the exhibition will take place on Saturday 11.08.2012 from 15.00 to 17.00 with a possibility to talk with the artists, music and a champagne reception.

QUEER as a term for gay has been well established by society.  

The question of its acceptance remains unanswered, which is why the question of acceptance was not necessary for this exhibition. The only thing that's certain is that each observer and artist has their own opinion and association with the word 'queer'.

ARTIST
Petra Arnold
Richard Kyriakides
Li Haibin
gay.edge.liberation
Falk Kästle

MODERN & CONTEMPORARY ART GALLERY, House 2
Mon - Fri 09.00 - 19.00
Sat 09.00 - 17.00

gay.edge.liberation, preferring to remain anonymous, could be described as a 'gay Banksy' of sorts. He mostly chooses to portray provocative and edgy homoerotic themed imagery. 

Check out and like his Facebook Page here

 

Some of the work on display from gay.edge,liberation

I chose a less provocative approach to my images, and even found a way to incorporate a skyline into the project. I wasn't given a lot of time, and I wanted the viewer to see that homosexuality is everywhere whether they like it or not, and it's here to stay. 

I chose three styles of cities, an American San Fransisco style, a European style and an Emirates style Middle Eastern city. 

The windows would be lit mostly in white, with some of the windows lit up as the Pride Flag Rainbow.

from left to right, Red Light by Night, Tourist's Delight, Homosexuality is Everywhere (in Europe) and Homosexuality is Everywhere (in the Middle East)

 

 

Homosexuality is Everywhere (in America)

left to right: On the Prowl, Stages of Erection, and Rainbow Cum

...on second thought, perhaps some of my work was rather provocative ...

Here is an article for the exhibition, in German. It describes my work "the rather nice looking drawings of metropolitan areas from all around the world, come from the London artist Richard Kyriakides - he wants to show that homosexuality occurs in every place on earth even if they are not allowed to show it."

 

  .

My Portfolio Website

My new website has been completed for a few months, showcasing 'new' work not seen on this blog. Click here to view more images like the one below.  Whenever is clever for you. I appreciate every page visit and comment I get. Even if it's just one visit a month!

Tittikaka Is Back

Hey internet. How are you? Yes I know I'm one Lazy SOB, hoping that would change.

I know it's been awhile since my last entry into this blog. It stopped silent last Christmas, and have been meaning for a re-boot, however, I just kept putting it off.

On a rather sad note, one of my most dearly loved friends, George Refsum, died in June. This has affected my life and creativity somewhat drastically. I am still thinking of him often, and I will never forget him. I drew this for his family, and in his honour, it was the very least i could do.

Despite this terrible news,  I did meet the love of my life around the same time, so it's been a summer of reflection with many moments of pure bliss and not just agony.


 From the Dutch to the Deutsch

I waved goodbye to Utrecht, the Netherlands, due to occupational
complication and have since moved onward to Mannheim, Germany in pursuit of new projects. It is the street art capital of Germany, so I have been told. It's very industrial here with factories and too many cars, and lots of really cool graffiti everywhere, giving the city a real 'London' vibe. Oh and I live next to this autobahn, oh the joy.